Mutual Blossoming
Couple Inquiry
Guidelines for Awakening Together Through Inquiry
- Our main practice is Self-Inquiry, the path that has been used for thousands of years for liberation and ultimately Self-Realization.
- The focus of this practice is on understanding and opening up to the divine within ourselves and discovering our True Nature.
- Adhering to a set time develops a strong container for relating. (Usually 15-20 minutes with 5-10 minutes sharing.)
- We are shifting focus away from personality towards an expanded sense of self. Meanwhile, honor what comes up.
- Trust creates openness, understanding and beautiful relationships.
- We promise to support our process and the unfolding True Nature of our partner.
- We commit to maintaining an open-minded curiosity.
- We take full responsibility for all of our thoughts, words and deeds.
- We never blame our partner for how we feel, for our feelings are our responsibility.
- We inquire into and explore the messages our feelings have for us.
- The words we use are vibrations that have enormous impact, and so we need to choose our words carefully.
- Our thoughts, our conversations and our actions inform and create the world we live into. Let’s be conscious creators.
- We all already have what we need within ourselves and our partners can help us remember what we may have forgotten.
- Practice listening to your partner with no agenda.
- Develop an attitude of neutral loving kindness.
- Do not interrupt another’s monologue.
- Ask questions, but do not interpret.
- Trust the process.
- NEVER physically act out on your self or your partner. No violence. Physical abuse ends relationships.
- NEVER verbally assault your partner. If you do, apologize immediately. Verbal abuse ends relationships.
- Stay clean and clear with all of your agreements, especially regarding sexuality and finances.
- Clean up all addictive or codependent behaviors with a therapist, mentor or 12 step program.
- When triggered let your partner know that you would like to find time to inquire to explore your feelings and insights later when you feel calm.
- Keep impeccable agreements with your partner.
- Show up on time. This shows that you respect your partner.
- Process difficult material with a therapist.
- Practice love, kindness and support with your partner.
- Set times aside for special dinners, walks and dates.
- Remember that your Inner Guidance and True Nature ultimately will reveal great wisdom, truth and love.
- Honor your partner and see the Light in them.
- Trust your inner guidance, it will lead you Home.
Copyright Ayn Cates Sullivan and John Patrick Sullivan 2013
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